iwrite, therefore i am.

Last spring my facebook addiction was compromised when my cousin challenged me to a twenty-four day cleanse.  Being competitive, I took the concerned dare and suffered from diarrhea, bed sweats and a serious thirst for attention within the first forty-eight hours.

Now I am writing more (obviously blogging), so her theory was a bust. Undeniably, she made waves within me when I realized my insatiable need for instant gratification. After my cleanse was over and I’d be out and about, maybe in the shower and away from technology, I would panic thinking, "will I remember this witty blurb I’m thinking long enough to 'post' it as my status?" Then I’d run to type it and twittle my fingers waiting for a "like," or a "despise you" to flash back at me. I felt empowered. And ridiculous.

I love social media and technology. Though often stressful and absurdly time-consuming, the www is a brilliantly sticky woven web of expedient life. We have wii fit to exercise. Skype for those too far to touch. There’s texting for those in need of quick answers or a distraction from a painfully boring meeting. Sexting for the masses and GPS for the lost. We have angry birds to calm impatient children and ipads to read best sellers or to educate on-the-go. Thankfully paging seems mostly back to it’s rightful owners, the doctors.

And now we even have . . .  the Patch. We can rant, rave, crave, mock and hide anonymously with faux names or feared banter. We are safe, some of the time. Technology can bust our neighbors, invade a home price, expose family feuds and embarrass a child when financial ruin or parental infidelity is uncovered. Brittle skeletons can march and break and insult with no possible delete button. “Joe Schmo retracts this email” doesn’t mean anything other than, “crap, huge mistake and I’m horrified. Please, please give me a re-do.” I’ve done it, maybe you have too – but it’s out there and you have no ability to make it go away, technology got you but it’s not the end of the world. We all have much bigger fish to fry. As my amazing mom used to say, “This, honey, is a very small part of your entire life. Quite soon you’ll forget.”

Therefore I don’t care if you don’t like me or tell me my breath smells, that I wear baseball caps too often because I’m too lazy to shower before my daily chores. No matter what I say or do, technology is ahead of me and it’s ahead of you, too.

I write, therefore I am.