Things that make you go hmm..

I have a kindergartener who likes cupcakes.

This particular kindergartener is likely not the only one in her class.  However, she - has a birthday coming up and this item is at the top of her list to bring to class on her big day.  Nothing says birthday, like cupcake! 

Trouble is, she is discouraged from bringing that to share on her birthday.  Yep, not even on her Birthday.

Apparently, her school is too health conscious to encourage these shenanigans.  They are teaching her that sugary and fatty foods are poor choices with un-healthy outcomes.  Her sibling, a couple of years older – is studying the food pyramid in class and has been made aware of diabetes as part of the curriculum.  Then, there’s an older sister and this particular girl is on her way out of this school, graduating to the higher ranks of middle school. 

This particular girl’s parents were informed on orientation night at this institute of higher education, that their daughter has not just graduated into a new grade but to a new, improved, much larger environment.  As part of this new environment, she has graduated from her rank as a developing student learning about health and good choices to targeted consumer, capable of resisting excellent marketing including that of the pressure of her peers walking around with savory items in bold packaging.  That ability - this early, huh? Wow things HAVE changed since I was in middle school.

The message in her new school is that for lunch, her choices include Carls Jr Burgers, Taco Bell, Corn Nuts, chips and every other option that “sells”, as the school principal excitedly pointed out that day.  Aren’t fast food restaurants required to disclose caloric intake to us all?  Does the school provide that information to our kids?  Is it a secret?  I am thoroughly confused.  I thought that was education.  

It seems, healthy choices were SO elementary school.  In MIDDLE school, they are bad and we invite kids to make them anyway (take THAT -  5th graders!). Program this students:  Buy. Consume. Ignore temptations.   

And for us parents graduating to the ranks of this higher institute, hear the following:

We decision makers will de-centralize the lunch function by putting different interest groups in charge of lunch one day per week, then – if they happen to choose a fast food option all at the same time well, it’s purely coincidental! 

We will remind you that lunch programs change every year.  That we have an arrangement with the same daily lunch program your child had last year – one whole day per week.  We will highlight sushi in our presentation to show you that we care.  For crying out loud, we even have a garden salad option on our menu!  We are in the process of embarking on a major study to understand if iceberg lettuce has ANY nutritional value.  It is hard to find that type of information, the internet has made everything so complicated for us retailers..we mean, educators. 

We will speak about the healthy lunches we make available and show parents slides that indicate otherwise.  When parents spot the discrepancy, we will tell you the slide is outdated and confirm to the contrary with the lunch menu on our website.  Then, we will trust that you are neither informed or intelligent and lie to you, right to your face. And those, ladies and gentlemen, are our commitments to you as the people tasked with educating your kids in their formative years.

Welcome to middle school (oh, and don’t forget those cupcakes!).